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Watching Blade Runner again, maybe for the tenth time. Priss and Roy and Tears in Rain and all that stuff. Such a great flick. I’m looking forward to seeing the next one. It’s an absorbing movie. Even Beth is watching without being on a device.
If I only had four years to live, well, shit, what would I do? I can’t make the decision alone…too important. Gotta have assistance. My brain is a used up old car with manual roll-up windows and a broken radiator. The AC doesn’t work and there sure as shit aren’t any seatbelts. It loves to run at 150 miles per hour but it overheats all the time and I have to piss in the radiator out in the middle of nowhere while the coyotes stare at me and the turkey vultures hover around like…turkey vultures.
A vehicle needs maintenance periodically but I do not have the means to provide it. Drugs can help (my mind, mind you…haha get it?) a little bit…I guess. A vehicle needs fuel also. A life that burns twice as fast burns half as long, said the Man. Gotta find some fuel fast or that life won’t even have a chance to burn so bright. And to hell with all that. It’s a stupid analogy.
Wiley Coyote….Super Genius! That’s more like it. I’ll spend my life planning elaborate traps for a bony-assed little bird who runs really fast and relishes the opportunity to outsmart me at every bend in the red desert road. And it’s all sponsored by Acme Corporation. That’s my life. I am constantly defeated by a missed step or a cracked outcrop and I fall a hundred feet to the dusty road below. But I never die. That’s the rub. I keep doing stuff. I keep planning things and paying too much attention to the stream of ideas that runs in circles around and around in my little cave dwelling behind some rocks in that awful desert with that jackass bird constantly foiling my plans. But sometimes it works a little bit. I’ve actually eaten roadrunner. Not The Roadrunner, mind you. But I have eaten one or two of its kind. Not much meat. It you dry it out you can get ten years worth but you have to really meter it out and sometimes in the winter it gets pretty scary and you may need to supplement with a can or corn or something.
The movie is almost over. Roy is chasing Deckard through that old building and bashing everything to pieces and he’s about to make the Speech. Such great dialogue in this thing. Everything is wet and greyish-blue and it’s all ABANDONED!
A change of heart and the Speech. Tears in rain. Always gets me. It’s a pathetic end to a fast-burning but short life. I wonder which is better because it gets kind of boring on the hundred year plan. You actually live several different life times within that jeering span. The span is the outline and the Mind who makes the decisions…it peers on at you in a sort of narcissistic realization that YOU are ultimately sprinting around in strange patterns and every once in a while you stop and have a moment. And the moment can be a few minutes or ten or thirty years or longer. But at the end of the line, when you have run your last pattern and the rain starts falling hard and grey those moments will end up washed away like Roy’s. And that’s how movies get made! You’re welcome…
Jesus what a morose entry! I am really sorry for that. How about this to end things up:
I have noticed that the coyotes have begun to shit everywhere again. I don’t know what they eat but it is red and has what appear to be a lot of pumpkin seeds in it…or something similar. That means little dogs should not go walking around alone at night. Though…the more I think about it, the more I want a coyote puppy. They are fascinating. We’ll put a collar on it and call it Banjo Fred and he’ll be our inspiration for many home movies, newspaper cartoons, and oil paintings. And that’s FINAL! No negotiations.
Go ride your bikes and walk your dogs and enjoy your lives. You never know how much time you’ll get.
